Saturday 3 August 2013

British political polling

Populous - generally considered to be the benchmark in absolute reliabilty, unbiased accuracy and total integrity - confirms what we all knew all along (even Tories, in their dirty little Tory 'hearts'): the nation is deeply in love with Ed Milliband's glorious project of renovation and revitalisation, and dreams of the day the Tory chancers are shown the door, never to darken the precincts of Downing Street again.

CON 29%
LAB 40%
LDEM 11%
UKIP 12%

Meanwhile, the highly suspect and oft ridiculed YouGov - traitors all - have produced and other fanciful so-called 'poll' which suggests - laughably - that the Labour lead might only be measured in single digits.

CON 34%
LAB 40%
LDEM 10%
UKIP 11%.

The good yeomen of England, the canny denizens of Scotland, even the miserable demi-humans of the other bits, recognise this as the cheap trick it is and call for the perpetrators of the Wellesian bit of hoaxery to be carted off to the Tower forthwith.

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